"i have NO feelings"

EVERYONCE HAS FEELINGS.....right?
well my new best friend, says he doesn't--i dont believe him, but whatever
NOT THE POINT OF THE BLOG...
anywho::
my feelings are this,
-not exactly are friends overrated, but they are not that important in the BIG picture
no selfishness...just in the end YOU ARE WHAT MATTERS
-i wouldnt say im a flip flopper, but certain things sway my opinion
-school blows my mind
-tuition is killin me..to the point where well yea the UNEXPECTED HAS TO HAPPEN
-imma call a few out TeShia, Redd, Eric---no matter what..temple woulda been a whole lot diff without you guys
-i dont kno what i want to do with my life, cuz i dont think business is for me ANYMORE
-I MISS MY FAMILY...but dont wanna go home for good--sadface
- sometimes i feel i LOVE him and other times i think ive wasted my time
- i want something real, i want happiness and love
- my name is jaelyn and i kinda dont care how people look at me, i just demand my respect
ALL OVER THE PLACE but HEY, THAS HOW MY LIFE IS RIGHT NOW
im on to a new journey each day....if u wit me, U WIT ME... if u not- O WELLLLLL
((*GOODBYE*))

im lookin up, but its lookin down

life is about to change
and i dont know if im ready for this change
shakin:my:head
to be continued...
1

NOVEMBER 18th

yall know what today is

???

yep

BEYONCE

or should i say...MRS. SASHA FIERCE

.....

........

...........

my shits pre-ordered, cuz my pops buys them for me all the time, so its at home waiting for me.....YAYYYY, i feel like a kid in a candy store!!!!!

my best friend, BEYONCE, did it again!!!

HOW ITS SUPPOSE 2 B:

well i gotta do this post b4 i do the post i came on here to POST..:

CONGRATUALTIONS 2 BARACK OBAMA (late?? hell yea, but gotta show my respect)

>>>we got a black president ....yallllll<<<<

November 4, 2008------> a great man has inspired CHANGE and created HOPE

......and sure was philadelphia, pennsylvania-temple university, broad st to city hall POPPIN'

..YESSSSSSS.

UH OH UH OH... 11/08

YOUR GIRL IS BACK

nah

NOT ME!!!

.....im on my grind--doin this school thing, like 9-1 hahaha!!!

but i'm not talking about myself

i'm referrin to my best friend: YEP

SUMTIN LIKE THIS...check it'

"ughhhnn...jae"-

"you ready B"-

"lets go get 'em"-

yes i'm talking about BEYONCE KNOWLES (my best friend)

NOVEMBER 2008........... grab it, take it, buy it, download it--just make sure ur listening to it

...because the greatest to ever be great, is BACKKKKKKKK!

...FIND ME.....

i love my life
i love my family
i love my friends
but i dont have love
....i dont know love
----but i kno i want to find it!
..............
i gave up on a few, lost interest in others
so where is my love?

>>>i lay my head on ur chest and feel possibly the greatest feeling in the world, but i have a feeling you dont have the same feeling. What seems to be sooo right, is evidently not that right after all, you messed up and lost---> but i wanna give u a 2nd chance
SO IF YOUR GOING TO TAKE IT, REMEMBER THIS:
be kind to me, because im gentle
be real with me, because im truthful
be yourself, because if your not-i will never know who you are
AND I THINK I CAN LOVE THE REAL YOU....

:.::AGAIN::.
i want to smile when i see you, get happy to receive a message from you, be able to call you whenever, wherever, and for simply no reason at all, i want my FAVORITE back :(
BUT, i dont just want a bit of you.. i want you fully
--SO IF YOU CAN GIVE me my want and need, then come back
because at this moment in time, im sad, im depressed, and i'm hurting
because i know your the love that i desire::
REAL LOVE!
.....its plain 'ol black n white love [LOVE ME]......

to the bestest:

Happy Birthday!!!

(yet again, late--but im doin better)

and as stated befre with other bday shout outs, you got love from me through phone; call n text, and online...facebook, and if i were home ((BOSTON)) u woulda got the whole shabang!!!

HA!

make the big 20 count...

I LOVE YOU, ADRIANNE ROBINSON

.........and all that good stuff, your my sister, but 1st your my best friend

happy 20th birthday girl!!!

Been gone so long...let me give sum shout outs:

Although a bit late.... i luv u guys--and only late cuz i been bust..and havent been on this

BUT U GUYS..GOT UR PERSONAL PREZ'S N SHOUT OUTS

here we go:::.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY: ((here come the pictures!!!))

REDDY...my bostonian/temple love...

IVETTEY

TeShia (like honestly the new love of my life)

SCOTT...in school 4 so long..miss u boo

i love you people.....and glad yall made it another year!!!

dueces!.....c yall nxt yr..haha ((BTW: my bday the 20th owwWW))

i may be sad for a very long time
the message i just sent someone could forever change my life
should i have thought twice about sending it
it needed to be sent...but now i'm unsure of the ramifications
UGHHHHHH......why?

life.........well mines

ive been GONE along time......why?
IDK
but ive gathered thoughts n ideas
and i just need to put them to use
...nothing exciting has been going on..or nothing much has changed
yep still bored...dealing with clusters of problems
ranging from: an ex (that im not sure i want 2b an ex) BUT STILL HE IS A MAJOR PROBLEM, family issues---but the the least of my worries, school/money(tuition), my future----cuz idk if business is my place nemore....sumtimes i wish i could just wave my magic wand! and poof things would get better.....BUT I CAN'T :(
but on a positive note...im happy to be home for the summer--around the ones i love the most, including my bestest friend ADRIANNE (makes me smile), and im lookin forward to TEMPLE '08-'09...o yea, ive missed my loves-
but the highlight of my summer has 2 be my lil brother, hes the funniest kid around!!!! when he goes to my fathers or to the park and is gone for more than 3hrs...my life starts to sadden...b/c hes happiness to me! he says the funniest thing: i jus wish i could remember
------this fool was hiccupping and i told him, i was gonna scare his hiccupps away, and he said "NO, i'll jus hold my breast"..lol he meant breath whooo FUNNY!--lol but one thing i gotta teach this boy 2 spell.....y was he lookin up info about the KKK...IDK but he sure spelled it, ku clux clan... IDIOT
I LOVE MY LIFE...and thas all that matters!

O we WON!

Anything is possible...anything is posssiiibblleee-KG
.....22yrs....and now banner 17 hangs in the TD BankNorth Garden!
we were hungry....we were aggressive and we played offensively and deffensivily!
DAMN.....AND WE SURE DESERVED IT
................................anything is possible
NBA Champions-the BOSTON CELTICS
now its time to bask in the glory...owwwWWW!

BTW::...if KOBE is compared to MJ one more time..i am going to have a heartattack....he is not the greatest and he is not that great......and just like an amazing reporter (whos name i forgot) said...if he was anything like JORDAN..a true legend..he wouldnt have been sitting on the bench when his team was down by like 40 in the 4th qtr..he would have been doing something to help his team..win--lol well they would of neva done that..but atleast not lose by sooo much!..eff kobe bryant..BEAT LA....nah WE BEAT LA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

can i know?.............NO

everyone wants to know what 37 means.....
i'll get back to you guys
AhahahahAHAHAHAHA!

AND HISTORY HAS RETURNED..

THE NBA FINALS HAVE TIPPED OFF.....

THESE TWO MEN HAVE LED THEIR TEAMS TO GREAT VICTORIES...now its time to see who will receive the ultimate prize!

What a match up......intense owwWW!--A RIVALRY..SINCE THE 80s.....LAST TO WIN L.A.--boston is taken it this year!

but ahahahah--BOSTON has the lead 3-1 SUCKERS! do not doubt us.....game 1, we were great!...game 2 we played stupidly, but still came out victorious..game 3..we wont talk abt that-WE LOST!...but indeed deserved the lost--btw...lakers only beat us by 6...on a terrible night (says sumthin for their team)..and game4....GOES DOWN IN HISTORY!!!....lakers up 24 for a good chunk-like we were in game2...but the difference is we came back and won the game!!!!!!!!!!!!!!....cuz we're AMAZING!

what you dont know about someone

so theres this kid i know....a confused kid--one who doesnt know what he wants in life....
although everything is right in front of him,
he has an amazing life--with many who care for him, treat him well, and spoil him with love
but yet theres still something missing in his life. BUT WHAT?
i'm one of those people that care for him, love him----> but i dont know if he just takes my love and others for granted or if really understands we deeply hold affection towards him....
........everything that he receives, everything that he has--would make you believe he is happy
BUT HE IS NOT......there is an unfilled space in his heart..
it is very sad.....and i cant seem to understand why(?)
Materialism---is not what love is made of..and i feel he has a false sense of what true love is
his family and close friends submerges him with money, gifts and other wonderful fortunes
but I, I try to just cheer him up...keep him on his toes--create a chuckle or two to leave his mouth----i want the boy to happy!
"Still up at 3am knowin my ass gotta be to work at 6am. Iam sittin here tryin figure out if iam really that bad of a person because everythin bad always happens to me. I keep it real allday but at the end of the night shit comes back and slaps me in the face. I jus don't kno wat to do anymore besides bein me. If yall don't like it then fuck it be out don't let the door hit u n the ass. Jus wanna thank my peoples for always bein there wen I need sum 1 to talk to. To all my haters yall keep watchin ur man rise to the top !!!"
I read this one night..well i should say morning...and was shocked..i knew he wasnt the happiest camper...but i ddnt know he felt that way--he thinks hes a bad person...and everything bad happens to him. Wow!
-------my response was ur a beautiful human being..and you should smile for everthing you've accomplished in your life....go to sleep get some rest and feel better-will talk at another time
DAMN...you never know what goes in someone's life...they can b smilng on the outside, but b so miserable on the inside
I JUST WISH HE KNEW HOW TO EXPRESS HIMSELF...or atleast let me in
do not simply focus on materialistic things, because in the end, they have minimal value...love is a far better choice!!...

...eekkKKK loudness

...ok so at work--there is middle-aged woman, maybe late 30s ealry 40s that i work with
she just bothers me in EVERY way.she makes me cringe---gosh i hate to hate people...but she drives me insane...eeekkkKKKK--loudness leaves her mouth
just a bunch of nonsense--she jus keeps talkin and talkin and talkin-
some customers like her boldness, her excitement and her personality
others merely share my headache--"jus shut up already"
i hate working with
i hate listening to her
when she goes on break there is a sigh a relief that leaves my body...
SHES GONE! i wish you could fire someone for talkin to much
i guess im exxagerating....no im def not....but i shudnt wish that she would get fired
SHAME ON ME!!!!
but honestly if u had to work with her 3 or 4 times out of the week...you may wish the same wish
....my lil bro came in the store today--and got to witness the wretched noise i listen to each day i work---she annoyed the hell out of him....i was l('in)mao
when i got home i said "see what im talkin about" and he patted my back and sighed....."jae, u'll b ok---mayb u shud jus tell her to shut up"

i was on the floor dyin..my lil bro is too funny!

its game time...

we did it!!!
...the CELTICS are going to the 2008 NBA FINALS....
...whoot whoot---ooowwWWW!
...HEY, even I had my doubts--BUT WE'VE PROVEN TO BE GREAT...PRETTY MUCH UNSTOPPABLE---so i say "bring it on LAKERS"
----LETS GO!----

3:12 in the morning

the a.m.
OMG....if u know me---u know i never sleep
everyone hits me up at all hours of the night, cuz they know that i'm wide awake
>>i have work at 8am..but party til 3 or 4am...if not partying, i'm doing hwk/phone/food/facebook/blog/or something else that doesnt allow me to sleep (who knows)
WOW! my health is probably terrible...i kno i need 8hrs of beauty rest..but i never seem to get it....(i'm still beautiful tho), but that is besides the point..
I NEED SLEEP
I AM SLEEP DEPRIVED...definition--i lack zzzzZZZ

take for instance tomorrow (technically today-cuz it is early morning)...i have to work @ 12...i prolly wont get to bed til 5am..and wake up round 10ish....thas only FIVE freaking hours of sleep! DAMN
LAST NIGHT I WENT TO BED AT 330am *due to a very important phone call that began around 1am and lasted til then (very important)* AND I WOKE UP AT 745am TO GO TO WORK had to be there at 8am....and worked a 10hr shift........................KILL ME
yesss...i'm a trooper--and i make it work
but i know this has to be bad for me...or at least in the long run it will
im going to make a goal to try to get 6 or more hrs a sleep a night
**so everyone who aims, texts and calls after hours---plz dnt..u'll help me sleep jus a bit more**
i'll let u kno how it wrks out!!!....be in touch

'08 love (over)...?

...although you could have been REAL
we are just friends, and I accept that...and am happy that we maintained a friendship
>>but in the back of my head...i'm like "what---I want you...a friend? NAH, thas not music to my ear's"---but I show none of these feelings because i'm STRONG and brush them off and move on..
---sometimes I feel this was the wrong step, but then again wrongs can be made RIGHT

RIGHT???

and then there is a part of me, that knows it was for the best! because I know it was not working
>> "errrRR but who knows, it could work?--try harder perhaps?"
time will tell.... I HOPE ::.sigh.:.
but in the end we will always be friends..and that is what matters
((i'll always wish to be in ur arms))

because there I felt like I never felt before***

[BLUE]

happy birthday girlll!

well today is a great day!....i know your wondering why(???)..but ob. according to the title its someone's birthday

guess who?---my lovely cousin! La'Clea!!!

she's my darling, my bf and , my SUNSHINE...SOoooo

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SUNSHINE!!!
i love my couz more than anything

............the big 20 clea, i'll b there in a few mths........

LOL! wait 4 me! mauhz and enjoy!!!

isn't she gorgeouz???? owwwWWWWWW!

???

so i m tryin 2 figure out wat i want to do with myself...
----like i really dont know
--kinda lost-right now- I could go right, but then i could turn left
-its hard out here
....til later days...i'll keep ya informed
cuz i'm clueless right now!

bOthERSOMe**

...dnt u hate--wen something bothers u

it bothers u to the point---u get so fustrated u dont know wat to do

- u think about it all the time
- it constantly reminds itself 2 you in any situation/circumstance
- u kno u shud just forget about, but that makes u think about it even more
ughhhh..... I HATE WHEN shit BOTHERS ME!...its like a pain that doesnt go away
an annoying habit u cant get rid of: biting ur nails or pointing (i hate wen ppl point)

WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN SOMETHING BOTHERS YOU...?
address it?
let it go?
or jus continue 2 let it bother you-thinkin it will oneday go away?
:::..sigh:: 2day something began 2 bother me...and now i need it 2 vanish
i need it to STOP BOTHERIN ME.....errRRrrr

Whats hott, right now???--let me tell you..

so the hottest thing out right now....are these gladiator sandals

...And guess what i love them!

I ABSOLUTELY ADORE THEM!

I think the obsessed shopper in me---is gonna get a few pairs....there a hott item, A MUST HAVE... and i WILL have many..i already have a pair!

....for the love of the GREEN!

Clearly, where i'm from ((BOSTON)) our sports teams are GREAT!...except for the unfortunate failure of the amazing New England Patriots....new yorkers can kiss my ass*
Boston has done well in its major sports..baseball world series CHAMPS...football pats as said previously 16-0 record, and now we have the Celtics best record of the 2007 season aka #1...
AND FOR WHAT? to play terribly on the road-during play-offs...I am a DIE HARD FAN, but there has been times I wanted ATL or Cleveland to put them out their misery.. ERRRrrr 3 amazing players-but when it counts, they all tend to suck!......OMG "lets get it together CELTICS"




IT IS NOT--- THE boston 3 PARTY...it is going to be like the Titanic...and Boston's ship is gonna sink!!! smh....we'll see what happens

*side note-if the Celtics don't win!, don't bet on the Lakers they're going DOWN..its all about them Spurs...owwWWW!*

it could've been REAL

.SO APPARENTLY i fucked up (*language i kno!*) a situation.. idk if i should even call it a situation..too casual, a FRIENDSHIP that was (excuse me) could've evolved.

a lil background}} hes beautiful in my eyes..dark chocolate smooth skin...n let me not front (like many say i do) i wantd him! HE BLOWS MY MIND!..like not even jus physically...i wanted all he offered--b/c he stands for sumthin...intelligent black man, VERY deep in conversation, passionate about so much, hes not like many others AND HE KNOWS IT::.
I FELL FOR HIM: and i began to let it show, and when he noticed..i knew i captured some of his interest....YESSSSsss..but deep down~not in a cocky way~ i knew i would've {{close

he tells me i oversteppped my boundaries as someone that doesnt have "wifey rights"...."i'm not supposed 2 send playful text that can be taken out of context?"...do u kno what i have to say to that...."I'M SORRY you cant take things lightly"........ we argued b/c you believe your a force that should b respected..BUT GUESS WHAT "i agree", but i need the same respect--so stop tellin me "i'm not like these otha niggas" I KNOW THAT!
i'm sorry you feel, i treat u the same way...i dont think i do at all...i get uptight around u...idk wat to say...AHHH...u challenge me!!!

//pretty much..i understand what you mean to an (extent)..--->im quiet and act very shy in person..cause i am!-but through other ways of contact/conversation--i can outdo myself..therefore sometimes comin off wrong *i guess like i did*
im learnin..
HOPEFULLY ONEDAY YOU'LL SEE ME AS A WHOLE...cuz i feel you only get parts at a time..and then maybe the FRIENDSHIP can extend....
you could've been the REAL thing
...................sadface......37